Log 22.6.22
watched hunt for the wilderpeople today!!! i know i know year of our lord 2022 and i still havent seen it. well i have now! so that's that! spent the whole movie waiting for both taika waititi and then rhys darby to show up. /hj i WAS waiting for them to show up but i was also like. enjoying the movie. i would like to have looked it up on doesthedogdie first (LITERALLY the dog dies i am so upset) but!! it wasn't too bad in that regard i don't think i was crying for more than about 10 minutes which is pretty good for me and my hyperempathy all things considered :) i didn't even cry at the first death in the movie (though i think i wasn't quite attached enough yet,,, i knew something was gonna go wrong). i don't actually remember the girl's name or her dad? but i was glad they were there. it's nice to have like... unconditionally good people. people who can be relied on. it upsets me when movies don't have that i think bc it feels like EVERYTHING is going wrong and just aaaaa stressful yknow??

also i think i may have talked myself into rewatching or rereading the hunger games. i forgot how good they are and was talking 2 someone about them today,,, if i do end up doing that ill make notes as i go :]

another thing abt hunt for thw wilderpeople i liked is that ricky was like. actually 13. like that IS how 13 year olds act. 13 year old boys who think theyre cool especially. idk it just felt accurate or at least MORE accurate than most 13 year olds in media ive noticed. there was only one thing that fully and completely broke immersion for me in the whole movie and that was when mr waititi showed up i associate his face SO STRONGLY with ed now that it's impossible to see him as anything else. like hello mr pirate sir?? mr ed blackbeard pirate teach sir??????? what is going on

anyways. that's me n my sh!tty facial recognition if i DO recognise an actor i cannot get past it at all <3

Log 18.6.22b
okay so theres some other stuff ive watched in the past month and ill get to that but in the meantime. i just watched the truman show and i have some THOUGHTS. i found it absolutely uncannily relevant and i think it should be mandatory watching. but we'll get to that.

initial thoughts - i found myself often questioning "well why didn't they just do that? why do this?" etc but eventually got over myself enough to be able to enjoy the movie. i think the fact that they started with interviews with the "actors" was a great choice bc it immediately gave me a basis for who the actors were, and framed them as "actors playing characters". i noticed that all of the acting slips (that i caught) were actually reasonable in-character slips, and found it extremely believeable that they were in-universe actors. marlon especially, i was thinking that in-universe he seemed to be a much better actor than meryl. and ofc truman himself was cast excellently. idk, it was just especially good acting and i found that part of it extremely easy to buy into, which is impressive considering the meta nature of it!

i wasn't considering this at the time, but looking back, there are interesting parallels to be drawn with the hunger games. both the whole "control every aspect of the area/set" "one person masterminding it all" type thing but also - and this isn't necessarily obvious, but bear with me - the inherently abusive nature of fame. suzanne collins wrote THG from a legitimate place of anger about how people, especially children, are treated in the tv industry and although TTS approaches it from a completely different angle i think they come to the same or similar conclusions. in TTS especially i found interesting the genuine affection that the audience held for truman. they were cheering when he escaped! yet they did not seem to understand how obviously complicit in the show they were. they were the audience; they were the ones helping the ratings; they were the ones letting sylvia's voice remain a minority. there's definitely interesting comparisons to be drawn there with especially Catching Fire, how the people in the Capitol genuinely cared for Peeta and Katniss (and the other competitors) and yet at the end of the day, were willing to and thus complicit in letting the games continue.

there were also some aspects that reminded me of the final and most recent matrix movie. obviously there's the whole "world around you is a lie" type deal, but specifically i'm thinking about "others trying to convince you that you are experiencing delusions but you're ACTUALLY correct". i'm not quite sure how i feel about it, if i'm honest. in both the narratives, it made sense - it didn't feel gratuitous or completely insensitive - but idk. just makes me feel odd, as a nd person who does not (as far as im aware) experience delusions but is friends with people who do.

now im thinking about the matrix again. gotta stay on topic.

obviously, the parasocial relationships thing is now omnipresent. it's another one of those terms, like "gaslighting" or "emotional labour" that have been used and overused into oblivion until they're no longer useful terms. i'm going to use it, though, because as far as i know there's no other way to describe that unique relationship. i think TTS is not necessarily a representation of standard parasocial relationships, because Truman is completely unaware of their existence. however, it does provide an interesting study (i am using study in the artistic rather than scientific sense). to me, the film suggests the message that true connection relies on honesty and equality. there is no way for a relationship to form if the participants are on metaphorical uneven ground. the illusion of a relationship can form, but it will not be perceived in the same way by both parties. i am sure the in-universe actor for marlon held genuine affection for truman, but you can't truly be friends with someone you have been actively deceiving for the entirety of both your lives.

anyways. wish i could write my english assignments about actually interesting media like this lmao it would be so much easier. but whatever i guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

in other news:

- i watched a season and a half of the original muppet show + the movie (a three week hyperfixation,,,, i am now crocheting a muppet. gonzo my BELOVEDDD)
- i watched 2 episodes of stranger things w niamh and z and at first i was ambivalent (once you hear about something so much it's hard to like it) (not niamh or z's fault just School People) but now its starting to grow on me just a little. however i almost never Watch Things unless someone watches with me soooooo the ball is in ur court besties B)
do either of them even read this? who knows
- i watched 2001 a space odyssey nothing like what i expected but sooo worth it. its the worlds slowest movie though. like. g o d d a m n. it is Something Else. both my parents fell asleep askdjghsfdjk but it left quite an impression on me im going to get niamh to watch it with me soon. Movies Of All Time as the kids (hello calliope if youre reaidng this) say. if i do rewatch it im gonna do a more complete post with more thoughts
- im like. 90% sure there have been other things but i cannot for the life of me remember what they are. ive been playing minecraft!!! and stardew valley :3 having a lovely time in multiplayer 4 both of those. my cousins, sister, sisters bf and cousins gf are in a realm together and ive been playing with them a little!!

havent watched the x files in so long :(( i miss them. but also,, im hesitant to watch any further? they just seem to be sad and traumatized all the time,,, i miss my funky little fbi agents. hoping dale cooper will fill that niche in my heart so i can continue watching mulder get his 𝚊ss kicked by life.

oh actually!! final note!!!! i'm about 100 episodes into my magnus archives relisten and it's going great. jon my beloved my little guy i am so sorry. you are having such a terrible time and i love you. it's so hard hearing tim as well :( he is. such a good person and he is so very traumatized and doing his absolute fuckign best. melanie best girl. ive also been relistening to old wtnv episodes to sleep to ^_^ but havent listened to any past 200 yet. need to catch up on thoseeeeee maybe tomorrow. idk

sat down to write a short update but u all get an Actual Essay instead so!! ur welcome!! or im sorry!! whichever fits ur experience better. actually no if u arent here to watch me have far too many thoughts and opinions then why ARE you here??? <3 if u read these ily. going to bed now :3

ok i lied ONE MORE THING dracula daily is BACK and i am SO worried about jonathan i hope he is going to be okay. alright thats it im done for real now

Log 18.6.22
i swear to god i wrote an update for rthis but it got deleted somehow :(((